How to develop a relationship from friends to lovers.

More than friends, less than lovers.
It's a very fun period of time right before you start dating.
However, on the other hand, it also means that they are still just friends, even though they are still in a relationship like a cheating lover.

If you're having trouble with our current relationship, then we need to figure out a way to fix this!

In this article, I'll diagnose the subtleties of their relationship and give you some tips on how to take it one step further!

What is “more than friends but less than lovers”?

I've often heard the phrase “more than a friend, less than a lover”, but what kind of relationship is “more than a friend, less than a lover”?
Do I and my boyfriend fall under the category of “more than friends but less than lovers”? Some of you may be wondering.
So first, let's talk about the criteria for “more than friends but less than lovers.

Many times we've gone out alone together.

Even if you've gone out together many times, if you've only gone out with multiple people instead of just the two of you, then you're just friends.
If you are more than friends but less than lovers, it would be unnatural if you have never gone out alone together.

However, you can go on a date without being in a relationship to see if you are suitable for each other.
So, the point is to see how many times you have gone out alone together.

The basic form of a relationship between a friend and a lover is when two people go on many dates alone, and to the outside world it looks like they are dating, but they know they are not.

Frequent communication.

It is not common for men and women to keep in touch with each other every day, no matter how good friends they are, and even if they do not have a professional relationship.
If you often keep in touch with each other just for chit-chat without any specific business, then it is safe to say that you are more than friends.

Especially for men, the reason why they keep in touch with women when they have no business to do is usually because they are either trying to fit in with the other woman or they are interested in her.

One of the characteristics of a relationship between friends and lovers is that the tempo of casual chit-chat is high, but there is an atmosphere of not daring to mention what each person thinks of the other.

Go out for dinner or drinks alone with them.

The sight of a man and a woman going out for a meal or a drink alone in private is, to the eyes of others, a date in itself.
If two people enter a restaurant together, they may be assumed to be a couple or a married couple.

Even if the restaurant where you eat and drink is a popular place like an izakaya or family restaurant, you will still be considered a couple by the people around you.

However, when you're less than a girlfriend, you can't have the same kind of sweet atmosphere as a couple of lovers, and the conversations you have are only between friends.
However, you can't talk about everything in a casual manner like you would with a good friend of the opposite sex, which is a characteristic of a relationship between friends and less than lovers.

We can walk hand in hand.

Even if you are only closer than friends, it is not uncommon for two people to walk side by side and somehow hold hands or walk arm in arm.
Especially when you have been drinking, you may miss people somehow and get closer to each other than usual.

If you don't feel uncomfortable or uncomfortable when you hold hands, then it is a relationship that can be called more than friends.
And from a third party's point of view, they must look like a friendly couple.
However, if you can say that you are not in a relationship with each other despite holding hands, then you are less than lovers.

Let's diagnose him based on his actions and feelings.

We're too close to be friends, but we're not even dating.
Let's find out if your relationship with him is more like a friend or a lover, and if there is any chance of progress from your current situation.

He doesn't have a girlfriend to begin with, does he?

First of all, the basic premise is that he doesn't have a girlfriend himself, right?
Or you don't have any information that he might have someone (other than you, of course) that he likes.

If this is caught, it can be quite challenging.
To him, you are a “best friend” at best.

A best friend here is “a friend that you can talk to about anything, like a male friend.
In other words, it is more likely that you are more than a friend to him, but not a potential lover at this point.

Worst of all, you may have been treated as a position to give him romantic advice.

If his relationships with women are iffy, get them straightened out early on!
This will completely change our strategy for the future.
You may end up hurting yourself if you stay in a comfortable relationship.

Is there anything he says or does that reminds you of your girlfriend?

Is there anything in his words or actions that suggests he is a lover to you?
For example, they use heart marks in chat rooms, or they send you a loverly stamp.

If this is often the case, then there is a good chance that you are in the “one step closer to being his girlfriend” position in his mind.

It's just that for some reason, we can't make a firm “let's go out” contract.
Let's think about leading to a solution while figuring out why.

What is his opinion of you?

Has he ever made it clear in his words that you exist and that you two have a relationship?
A bad example would be, “I don't have any female friends that I'm so close to except you!” etc.
In this case, it is difficult, if not impossible, to rewind the situation because you have clearly been identified as a friend.

On the other hand, a good example would be, “I wish I had a girlfriend like you.
It may be that he just can't take the plunge because he doesn't have the courage to do so.
How you are treated by him is important in itself, but if you have a verbal commitment to the relationship, you should give priority and respect to that.

Does he have any playboy intentions?

Are you the only woman who is “more than a friend” to him?
Do you have such a relationship with other women?
If there is such a woman other than you, it raises the possibility that he is a playboy.
It is just a possibility that “you will be played” so to speak.

Even if he hadn't, it would suggest that he is a mentally fragile person.
He may want something to reassure and soothe him to the point that he creates a large number of women with whom he has a delicate relationship, less than a lover.

Can't we just be lovers? Why do you continue to have an ambiguous relationship?

If the person you love continues to be just a friend, you will only feel anxious.
If you can find out what reasons men give for staying in a relationship that is more than friends, you will be able to find ways to deal with them.

It's a cozy friendship.

Why does he not recognize you as his girlfriend in the first place?
One of the reasons is that you don't have to be a lover.
To put it more simply, you can't feel more than friends.

Indeed, you may be in a position to be closer to him than other women.
It may be a more forgiving relationship that goes beyond the boundaries of female friends for him.

But that's as far as it goes.
You may be more than a friend, a “confidant” or a “best friend,” but you are not seen as a romantic interest.

I want to go out with you, but I lack the courage!

Here's the most hopeful reason I can think of!
From his point of view, you are a love interest, and he would like to go out with you and make you his girlfriend if he could.
But I'm afraid that by approaching her myself, I'll lose this comfortable relationship we have now.
In other words, he “doesn't want to be heartbroken.

At the same time, there is a high possibility that he is considering the very human anxiety of not wanting to let go of the very existence of you that he can trust.
In this case, your first priority is to reassure him, so you need to be brave enough to approach him from your side.

If you can get him to think that it's okay to attack you and that you have a pulse, you've almost won.
If you don't have enough courage, all you have to do is to create an environment where you can have courage.

“There's a hole in your heart that can only be filled by being more than friends and less than lovers.

This is a very complex psychology!
For example, let's say that something painful has happened to you and you have suffered a heart attack.
What can fill that wound, what can heal that wound?
It depends on the content, doesn't it?

Perhaps it is the warmth of family that heals the wounds.
It could be a pet, or a friend of the same sex.
Maybe it's work, maybe it's a hobby.

And just as there are holes in the heart that can only be filled with those, there are also holes that can only be filled with the presence of the opposite sex, who are more than friends but less than lovers.

A relationship that is clearly more than your average heterosexual friend.
But they are not lovers, it's a delicate relationship.
A neutral relationship where neither sex nor kissing took place.
But we are both somewhat aware of the fact that we are a man and a woman.
This relationship is the reason why I feel so comfortable.

And that comfort is likely to be lost when the relationship is sublimated into a lover's relationship, which requires a great deal of courage and a kick in the pants, even though curiosity is stimulated by the progress itself.

I've been kissed by a guy who is more than a friend but less than a lover! What's in a man's mind?

If a guy who is more than a friend and less than a lover suddenly kisses you, you may wonder if it means he likes you. You might wonder.
Of course, this is a possibility, but in the male mind, it doesn't necessarily mean that he kissed you because he likes you.

I was carried away by the mood of the moment.

For example, when you see a beautiful night view in front of you, or when your eyes suddenly meet and you stare at each other, the man's feelings will be equally excited when the woman is expecting a kiss.

Even if the other person is more than a friend and less than a lover, there is a moment when a man feels horny and wants to kiss you when he sees your moist eyes and lips in front of him.
When you kiss someone, you don't think about the consequences.

If you say it's just a fluke or a spur of the moment thing, you may be disappointed as a woman, but it's not impossible to sway his heart with a kiss.

Behavior that shows that you like them.

Normally, kissing takes more courage than confessing your feelings, but for men who are not good talkers, sometimes their body moves before they can express their feelings in words.
In other words, you may be so full of love that you end up kissing her.

As a woman, you may feel awkward, but if your relationship with him is not bad, it is a chance to develop a relationship.
If he kisses you, it means that he at least sees you as a member of the opposite sex, so it should not be unlikely.

I wanted to see how she would react if I kissed her.

This pattern is common among playboy type men.
For now, I try to kiss her and see how she reacts to me.

If a woman gets in on the kissing, she is hoping that you will let her do more than that, and if she resists, you are drawing the line at not attacking her any further.

If you feel that the man you are kissing is not nervous and seems to be in a familiar mood after the kiss, this is usually the pattern.
If you want to go out with him, don't blame him too much for kissing you, but make sure that he doesn't have any further contact with you before you go out with him.

Can I have a relationship with him? Signs of a pulse from him

Even if you want to go out with a guy who is more than a friend but less than a lover, you don't want to crush him by confessing to him with no pulse.
You can also judge whether he has a pulse or not by his daily attitude and behavior.
If there are signs of a pulse, don't miss them.

They can help you when you need it.

If he is willing to help you when you ask for help in a troubled situation, you can consider that a sign of a good pulse.
Men are more than happy to take a little trouble if it's from a woman they like.

If he likes you, he will be happy to help you because his pride as a man is tickled to know that he can rely on you in times of trouble.

On the other hand, if he seems annoyed or doesn't try to help you, you should consider that he has no pulse.

They are friendly and helpful for consultation.

If you talk to him about your personal problems and he is kind enough to help you out, that can also be taken as a sign of a good pulse.

Unless you and he are direct supervisor and subordinate, if he listens to you seriously about your work and relationship problems, it means that he likes you in no small way.

Men are not very interested in discussing the problems of women who are not interested in them as members of the opposite sex.
If it's a business relationship, he may be accommodating, but if it's not and he's serious about asking for advice, there's a good chance he has a pulse.

He contacts me frequently.

Even if you keep in frequent contact with a guy who is more than a friend but less than a lover, if he always responds to your calls, it is unlikely that he has a pulse.

On the other hand, if he frequently contacts you about trivial things, it is a sign that he wants to get your attention.
It can be assumed that they enjoy interacting with you and are actively contacting you.

Even if the conversation doesn't have a sexy vibe, if he continues to contact you, you have a strong pulse.

They spend all day with me on holidays.

What is the best time to meet him as more than a friend and less than a lover?
If he calls you out when he has free time, or just to kill a few hours, then unfortunately you might want to consider that he has no pulse.

If he has a pulse, he will try to make as much time as possible to spend with you.

So the best time to meet would be when he is off work and has no other plans.
If something urgent comes up and you have to leave in the middle of the day, they will make it up to you on another day.

They're willing to work around our schedule.

If he asks about your schedule and availability when you go out to eat or play with him, you can consider this a good sign.
You can assume that he is caring for you because he likes you.

If you're just a friend to him, he thinks it's fine to meet you when you're both available and he doesn't want to force himself on you.

If he chooses to meet you at a place that is easy to get to from your office or home, or if he makes time to meet you even if it is a little overwhelming, that is his way of caring for the person he loves.

He'll keep my schedule open for special occasions.

If he leaves plans for unusual special occasions such as Christmas or your or his birthday open to spend time with you, that is almost always a good sign.

You may think that he just happens to be free because he doesn't have any plans, but if he doesn't have any particular intention of developing their relationship into a relationship, he wouldn't bother to spend time with you on a day that would be awkward and full of couples.

Some men make plans with their girlfriends as pseudo-relationship partners out of loneliness, but being chosen as a pseudo-relationship partner means that there is no chance of becoming a real lover.

If you want to make progress in your relationship with him, don't miss the chance to do so.

They'll let me take a couple of pictures.

It may be hard for women to understand, but many men feel uncomfortable taking a two-shot photo with someone other than the woman they are interested in.
Especially if he doesn't want to take two selfies on his phone, there is a high possibility that he doesn't have a pulse.

Men do not want others to misunderstand that they are in a romantic relationship with a woman they do not want to date.
So if you're with a woman who doesn't have a pulse, you're afraid that she'll post a picture of the two of you on social media or show it off to others.

So, if he agrees to take a picture with you without any resistance, there is a good chance that he has a pulse.

Is this a relationship of convenience? How to tell if it's for real or for fun

They say that a man's mind is simple, but from a woman's point of view, there are many things we don't understand.
The difference in the way you treat women, especially serious women and playful women, is not something you can see just by looking at the surface.
So next, let's take a look at how to tell the difference.

Whether or not you can prioritize your schedule with me.

If he sees you as a woman of convenience, even if he has prior commitments with you, he will put them on the back burner in favor of commitments with other friends and women.
Men are very serious when it comes to distinguishing between fun and seriousness.

If he is serious, he will try to shift his plans to spend time with you, even if he has prior plans, if that is the only day you have available.
Unless there are extenuating circumstances, they will prioritize their schedule with you as much as possible.

Whether you will be invited to a hotel or a sleepover date.

When a man asks you out on a hotel or sleepover date, many women think that he might be interested in them. But the truth is that men do not lightly invite their true love to a hotel or overnight date.
Especially if you're not even dating yet.

If he asks you out when he hasn't even confessed his feelings to you yet, it means that he thinks you're a lucky guy and that you'll get laid.
In order not to be alarmed by a serious woman, he will suggest a healthy date in the daytime.

Whether or not you will be asked for love advice.

No matter how well you get along and sometimes have a good vibe, if he asks you for serious relationship advice, it is as good as saying that you will never be a love interest for him.

Some women dare to ask for love advice in order to tickle men's feelings, but it is rare for men to do so, and when they ask for love advice from a woman, they may be checking to see if she likes them.

So, if you are asked for love advice even though you are more than friends, you should first consider that you are not serious.

Whether or not he's interested in dating someone in particular.

Even if he has special feelings for you, it is sterile to want to make serious love with him if he himself has no intention of dating a particular member of the opposite sex.

If you're not interested in dating a particular person and you enjoy being more than friends, that's like being told that you like them but don't want to be responsible for them.
This is too much of a risk on the part of the woman.

It's fine if you're also playing around and enjoying your time with him, but if you're not, you might want to give up on him sooner rather than later.

I don't know if you'll accept my invitation on short notice.

For example, when you call him and say, “Can we meet now? Will he respond to your request?
If he has serious feelings for you, he will try to meet your needs, even if it means pushing himself a little.

Sometimes you just can't make it, but if you get kicked out every time with “I can't right now” or “Are you kidding? If you can't make it now,” or “Are you kidding me?”, it means that he is not serious about you.
Men want to listen as much as possible to the selfishness of the woman they love.

If you call him out of the blue and he hangs up on you fast, maybe he has a real woman in his life.

This is how you go from friends to lovers! Here are some recommended techniques to progress!

No matter how much you wish to make progress with a man who is more than a friend but less than a lover, if you continue to treat him as usual, nothing will change.
Use techniques that will tickle his manly fancy and bring the two of you closer together.

Spend more time going out together.

What they need to do now is just make time to be lovers!
When I say “more than friends,” it means that we are closer in our hearts than normal male friends.
Whether it's romantic feelings or not, the first thing you need to do is to spend time alone with them so that your brain will think that you are more like lovers.

But they are just friends.
Going out together doesn't have to be a date.
But that's okay!

Even if it doesn't look like a date, you can make it look like a date.
Spend time together as a couple.

But of course, there is no need to feel guilty or embarrassed.
Because they are “friends”.
You go to the movies with your friends, right?
We'd go to a pub!

“It may be frustrating to have a “less than” relationship, but you should take full advantage of the fact that you are more than just friends.

In a way, “more than friends” can be an exemption to “at least do what you can with friends.
There is no way not to take advantage of this.
It would be too much of a waste if you became self-conscious and reluctant!

Intense physical skin-to-skin contact.

If you are having trouble becoming more than friends, try to create a moment when a man becomes aware of a woman as the opposite sex.

Although it is the simplest and most primitive method, “body touch” is still an effective method.
In the same way that women are thrilled, men's minds are vulnerable to body touch at a moment's notice.

Depending on how close your relationship is to that of a lover, it is important to keep a loverly distance here as well.
But of course it will be difficult to hold hands.
“Let me touch your cheek! “Let me see your palm! and “Let me see your palm!

He will be aware that we are more than friends.
Regardless of the circumstances, the resulting skinship is likely to make your heart beat faster.

If you're friends, you can “sleep over,” right?

Because they're not lovers, are they?
We're friends, aren't we?
If that's the case, then I guess we can use that as an excuse to stay over at his house, too, from a physical standpoint.
It is very important to know how to ask and what to say. It's very important to know how to ask and what to say.

“I really need to talk to you about something, can I stay over? Give a reason that will not raise suspicion in your relationship.
Of course, you have to aim for the day before he's off!

To be honest, you never know what will happen when you go to stay.
You are an adult, so something may happen, or it may not.

But a “sleepover” when you're less than a couple is definitely enough of a catalyst to get your relationship going in some way!
The courage comes from you!

Talk to them about your problems.

Men are more attracted to women who feel like they have to protect them than to women who are dependable.
So, if you want to make progress with a guy who is more than a friend but less than a lover, you should first consult with him about your problems.

If your feelings are still in a state of excitement, it is likely that you will feel uncomfortable being called for advice, so instead of asking her to make time for you, casually discuss your problems when you are playing or having dinner together.

It's even more effective if the content of the advice is that you are being courted by other men, even if it's a lie.
If he has any special feelings for you, there's no way he won't bite on the subject.

It is also important to express your gratitude after consulting with them and receiving their advice.
No matter how long you've been friends, don't forget to be polite.

Try to call them the same day or the next day.

Most people would feel a little irritated or annoyed if someone they consider to be just a friend suddenly called them out for an unimportant reason.
But strangely enough, if it's a sudden call from someone you like, you feel rather happy.

Men are the same way. If they like you, they won't feel bad if you call them out of the blue.
If it's convenient for you, you can expect them to come and see you.

If you can't make it that day or the next day, if you have a pulse, you can make an appointment for another day.
If you are cut off easily, you should consider that you have no pulse.

I'll tell him that other men are approaching me.

If you're frustrated because he won't confess his feelings for you even though the mood is good, try tickling his possessiveness.

To do this, it helps to be honest about the fact that you are being approached by other men.
At that time, instead of speaking happily, give off an air of being a little troubled, and tell him you feel like asking him for advice.

If he has a pulse, he will take some action before another man takes you.

I'll ask to see his friends.

Men are willing to introduce a woman to their friends if she is their true love, but if she is not, they don't want their friends to know that they are even meeting alone.

So be brave and tell him that you want to meet his friends.
If he doesn't look uncomfortable or change the subject, there's a good chance he likes you.

Also, by having a friend introduce you to him, he will be more prepared and more likely to confess.
If he still doesn't seem to be able to simmer down, you can get acquainted with his friends so that you can fill in the gaps from the outer moat.

How to ask a “friend or less than friend” man out on a date.

If you want to ask a guy who is more than a friend but less than a lover out on a date, it is important to create a different “date-like” atmosphere.

Ask her straight out, “Let's go on a date.”

If you ask a guy who is more than a friend but less than a lover to hang out with you in the same way as usual, he will just take it as it is and be done with it.
If you want to make progress in your relationship, dare to use the word “date” in your invitations.

Changing just one word can change the mindset of a man from “playing with girlfriends” to “dating girls”.
It may be embarrassing for the person who asks you out, but think of it as the first step to making them aware of you as a member of the opposite sex.

Suggest events you want to go to.

For example, if you are thinking, “I'd like him to invite me to the fireworks display at the end of the month,” don't wait for him to ask you, but ask him yourself.
It's hard to make progress in a relationship that's more than friends but less than lovers, but if you keep waiting, nothing will change.

Even if you leave the role of asking him out to him, suggesting events that you would like to go to will lower the hurdle for men to ask you out on a date, so try picking up events that you are interested in and suggesting them as a way to help out.

If he cares about you, he will ask you to go with him.

Invite them to a romantic date spot.

It may be embarrassing to go to a goofy date spot with a guy who is more than a friend and less than a lover, but that's why you should be brave enough to go to a date spot that has a romantic and goofy atmosphere and is filled with couples.

If you have been friends for a long time, you may feel comfortable, but you will feel less thrilled.
However, if you are in a moody date spot, you will be carried away by the atmosphere and your heart will be pounding, and you will end up holding hands and huddling together.

If you are closer than usual, it will be easier for him to solidify his feelings. If he still won't confess his feelings to you, then go ahead and tell him how you feel!

summary

How was it?
We have presented a diagnosis of the relationship between two people who are more than friends but less than lovers, as well as some tips on how to step up the relationship.
The first thing you need to do is put a positive spin on your current relationship! Make a positive decision that you are one step ahead of the other women around you, and that you are only one step away from being a girlfriend.

Some people say that couples who have been friends for a long time have a deeper understanding of each other, which makes it harder to break up.
The current relationship is a step towards an amicable relationship! and make an effort to close the distance between you and him! A positive attitude and a little courage will push you both forward.

References

• The Sum of Friends' and Lovers' Self-Control Scores Predicts Relationship Quality
• Self, friends, and lovers: structural relations among Beck Depression Inventory scores and perceived mate values
• The Friends-to-Lovers Pathway to Romance: Prevalent, Preferred, and Overlooked by Science